Time flies. Wasn't it yesterday that I was compiling our third anniversary post?
Our wedding day started off cloudy and wet - not the kind of weather a bride dreams of waking up to. Thankfully, the sun came out an hour or two before the ceremony began and by the the time our guests arrived at the church the day had turned bright and cheerful. In a way, the weather that day was a picture of what our marriage would be like.
I "knew" marriage wasn't going to be easy, but of course I didn't really know. It was hard. It was work. It was choosing to love, forgive, obey, respect, honor, etc.
Along with all the love and laughter and happiness in our marriage there was also human-ness. Sometimes we messed up. Sometimes we put ourselves first. We miscommunicated. We argued. We said hurtful things. Sometimes I felt more anger towards Andy than I felt love. A LOT of times I felt like whatever argument we were having was all his fault.
It wasn't until two years into our marriage that I finally recognized and repented of my pride and selfishness. Instead of telling myself that I was such a great wife and Andy was lucky to have me (ha!), I began actively trying to be a more humble and respectful wife. In turn, Andy became a more humble and loving husband.
Those first two years were overcast with selfishness and spiritual immaturity. Then, in God's divine timing and grace, the sun came out.
We have our drizzly moments now and then, as all marriages do, but we communicate better and forgive quicker. We see God's hand on us and we desire to please Him in the way we care for one another. Every day is an opportunity for us to live our vows, and I'm so happy to report that four years later we're doing a better job than when we began.
even when it breaks, my heart will beat for you
oh my love, you're all I want
I know that it's never gonna come easy
but I would never even dream of leavin'.