Here is one of the greatest little pleasures of all:
"My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever."
Psalm 73:26 (NIV)
What does it mean, that God is my portion? I see it as this: God is enough. God will fill me up. If everything in my life were pieces of a pie, the God slice would be all I need. What He gives me, what His plan is for me- those things should satisfy me.
It has been a trial for me to hear about my friends receiving jobs since graduation. It made me question my talents, my abilities. It made me wonder why I wasn't good enough to have a professional job. It made me wonder if my family was disappointed in me. It made me wonder if people talked about me. My flesh and heart were failing. I was being swayed by the world into thinking that my worth comes from how much money I make. In doing so, I was questioning God's faithfulness.
Oh, but He is faithful! Remember my post on rearranging? The past few weeks have been filled with wonderful times with friends, time to work out, time to plan and cook healthy meals, time to study the Bible, time to read, time to take long walks, time to travel, time to organize my closet... :)
I am happier than ever. I am more content than ever. I truly mean that. I know so many people who are consumed by making money and getting better jobs and having more than others and it breaks my heart. I have all that I need in the Lord, plus some pretty awesome bonuses...(hot husband)! I hope I never lose sight of that.
Guess what? I got a job. In a couple of weeks I will begin a video editing project for a friend of the family. I get to work from home and choose my own hours. I don't know how long the project will take and what will happen when it ends, but God knows the desires of my heart: I get to use my degree in Media Arts and Design while still having time to devote to my husband, myself and our home. BIG sigh of contentment.